cryptic I know
I keep thinking about a friend who became important to me. I have never confided in too many people. But when I do, they mean a lot.
Well, something happened and she's not talking to me. I still see her around kinda, but we're not talking. I kind of feel like she wants to talk but isn't because of external pressure. Maybe wants to and feels like it would be improper.
She told me she wouldn't disappear but kind of did. I have tried to create opportunities for her to communicate, but feel funny about it. Maybe she genuinely doesn't want me to bother her.
So what I've decided to do is let go. If she wants to communicate, she knows how.
But this doesn't feel right either, I can't just give up!
I want my friend back!
And i am so tired I am going to sleep. I am working on a post but it is taking longer than expected and isn't coming out as well as I'd hoped.
Well, something happened and she's not talking to me. I still see her around kinda, but we're not talking. I kind of feel like she wants to talk but isn't because of external pressure. Maybe wants to and feels like it would be improper.
She told me she wouldn't disappear but kind of did. I have tried to create opportunities for her to communicate, but feel funny about it. Maybe she genuinely doesn't want me to bother her.
So what I've decided to do is let go. If she wants to communicate, she knows how.
But this doesn't feel right either, I can't just give up!
I want my friend back!
And i am so tired I am going to sleep. I am working on a post but it is taking longer than expected and isn't coming out as well as I'd hoped.
posted by MarkD60 at 8:26 PM
10 Comments:
You didn't sleep with her did you? It sounds like exactly what happened when a good friend and I slept togeather. (Before G-man and I dated). What made it worse was he lived in the apartment below me. Nothing will put a halt in friendship faster than sleeping togeather.
D. no we never slept together. we were just friends.
But I don't agree that sleeping together halts a friendship, it makes it grow into something else. But I know what you mean, it's almost impossible to go back to being "just friends" after sleeping together.
B. Thanks
If this was me, I couldn't let well enough alone. But, there are some people that do not like confrontation, and I guess the other person has to respect that. Sorry you've misplaced a friend. Give it time.
don't give up! i say keep it up and talk to her. as far as "improper", that may be an issue on her part, part of her upbringing, and you have to initiate the conversations.
I had something like this happen with my best friend from high school. We hadn't talked for years but I kept missing him so much until finally one day I wrote him a letter to tell him how I felt. He called me and was happy to hear from me and we've kept in touch ever since. I hope it turns out well for both of you.
How about a little honesty? I get worried about that stuff too, then the someone I'm worried about comes up and says something (finally) and I wonder what I was so worried about in the first place. It never hurts anything to remind someone know you're thinking of them and are around if you're needed. Just don't do it through 40 emails and 35 phone calls a day. Cause people get weird about that. :)
You could, you know, call her up and say, "Hi, how are things?" It can't make the situation any worse.
I agree with what people are saying about just asking her what is going on. Honesty is the best policy. I like all of your pics that you posted last. I just saw them now...very cool!
Hey Mark! Looks like I have some catching up to do here so I'll get to reading --- I couldn't NOT post though -- I had to help you into those double digits again! :) hehe Sorry about your friend. I can relate all too well to your feelings -- but like everyone else here has said, just be honest and upfront. If she doesn't come back to you and your friendship with her then maybe she wasn't a "true" friend afterall. True friends stick with you through thick and thin. As for someone's comment here about sleeping with someone and it never being the same -- that's true in some sense - but I agree with you that sleeping together doesn't necessarily halt a friendship either -- in alot of cases it really can make you see that person in a different light and can help you be better friends just not bed friends -- difficult to say what I mean here but I am sure you understand me...right? :)
She is an extremely high caliber person. There is no question about the quality of friend she is/was. If she feels she can, I am confident she will communicate, if she feels she can't, I will be the first to agree with her reasoning. I was only expressing something that I want. Want, as in selfishness. Nothing critical.
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